161 Days in the Hotel- Not so Paradise

I want everyone who reads this to know that this is not based on a true story. This is merely a work of fiction based off my Wonderful imagination. I want to write. I was born a writer. (Ask my sister). Unfortunately, I didn’t get to get that far in my life, so now I write for fun. Make fun of me… don’t. I personally don’t care. This is my story and I am going to write. So let’s get started.

Chapter One

Day 1: Today my husband kicked me out. I don’t know what I did to disappoint him, but he tells me he found someone “new.” She’s not “new” if he’s been having an affair for three months. Yes, that is how long it’s been going on. He admitted everything to me. He tells me “he’s not happy with me anymore” and says “it’s not you. It’s me.” Same old bullshit I’ve heard before.

So, now I sit here on this comfortable bed wondering what in the world I did wrong. I go through my list of “haves and have-nots” and can’t find anything out of the ordinary. The bed I am laying on as I write this, doesn’t feel comfortable. My body says it is. My mind says it’s not.

After I grabbed what I could out of my husband’s house, I found myself walking the busy streets of Detroit. Although, I was born and raised here and knew what street I was on, I felt completely different. I feel like I am a different person. Someone who doesn’t know what to do or go to. Earlier, I found myself sitting on a lonely park bench just on the outbanks of the North River with my things trying to keep warm. There were people that stared at me and others that dropped change for me. I didn’t want anybody’s money. I wanted a warm place to go to.

After about an hour of freezing my tail off, a kind, Christian woman came by and stooped down to my level. By now, my tears were frozen solid and my mascara had run all over my face. At first, I didn’t want to talk to her. I didn’t even want to look her in the eyes. I was embarrassed. I was distraught.

I finally caught the nerve to look her in the eyes and she had the most, unbelievable, piercing blue eyes I had ever seen. Her eyes resembled those of a Siberian Husky. I was amazed!

We both prayed about my situation and then the most amazing thing happened after we prayed! She had decided to put me in a local hotel until I could get back on my feet. After all, I did have a job as an editor for a local magazine company. I felt like I was on top of the world, but only for a short while.

She grabbed my things and put them in the trunk of her Jeep and asked me if I was hungry. I didn’t bother asking her where she worked or how she could afford all this, but I knew it would be rude of me, so I kept my mouth shut. I was hungry. I felt it. But my mind said no. “No. Thank you.” I responded. How cruel if me to turn down her offer! (She ended up taking me to a fast food joint and in the end, I did change my mind.)

I settled in the hotel an hour later, where I sit writing my experience so far. It’s a nice hotel. It’s a three story, five star hotel with free WiFi, continental breakfast, an indoor pool, housekeeping, and even has an electronic fireplace across from this bed where I lay. Classical music is softly playing on the stereo. Although I really don’t listen to classical music, right now I don’t mind it. I need something to relax my mind. I’ve got a little kitchen with a small-sized refrigerator, and a couple of loveseats off in the other room with a flat screen TV that hangs on the wall. The bathroom is a good fit with a tub and a walk in shower.

I’m supposed to feel like I’m in Heaven on Earth, but I can’t stop crying. I’ve already blocked Jerry, my now- soon to be ex husband from my contacts. I’ve blocked all his friends and co-workers from my contacts and from my Facebook page. I’ve even blocked his mother. I’m not fighting it. He wants a divorce, he’s getting one.

My eyes begin to feel heavy. It is around 7:00 P.M. I need to rest. Keep my mind off things. I set my journal aside, say a quick prayer and crawl underneath the sheets where I quickly fall asleep to the sound of classical music still softly playing and to the warmth of the electronic fireplace at the other end of the hall

Disturbing or not Disturbing?

Hi guys, it’s Tammy and today I want to talk about something that has been disturbing for me these past few nights. So, I think we’re all adults here, so it might seem a little foolish, but it’s been happening to me in my dreams the past two nights. Hence, why I’m up now, so I can record this in my blog. Okay, so I am friends with a guy on Facebook who graduated a few years before I did from the same school. Now, I heard of this guy in highschool, however, we didn’t hang out and we weren’t friends. He’s happily married with some kids, but please tell me why I’ve been having sexual dreams about him. I mean, I don’t think they’re that sexual, but in my dreams, I think he’s gorgeous and it got me thinking, what if we did hang out or even go on a date back then. Would I still be the same person I am today? Would we be happily married with kids? Or would have been just another relationship? I mean, he did serve in the Marines, which I didn’t think that would be something he would do, but like I said before, I didn’t know who he was in highschool even though I’ve heard about him. I am currently pregnant, and didn’t know if maybe that was just a part of it. I am in a current relationship but it needs a lot of work. Or am I just sexually frustrated? I don’t know, I guess I’ll have to see if this continues because I found this very bizarre. I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I’m attracted to men in uniform (not just the military) or maybe it’s because I served in the military myself. So anyways, guys, I’m sorry to cut this short. I’m eating peanut butter icecream right now and it’s just after 2 AM. So, I’m gonna take this on the road and I’ll talk to you guys later. Bye!